Tuesday, December 2, 2014

BALLS, BEERS, BABES & BRACKETS!

Who: Yobogoya! vs. Beer Drinkers and Babymakers
Where: Sahlen Stadium Field #2
When: Thursday, October 23rd 7:15PM

Beer Drinkers and Babymakers
Team CaptainSteve Seeley
Team Sponsor: Salinger's Bar & Grill
Captain's Pre-Game Strategy: "Well, I'm an old man compared to this league. So what I do is, I stretch, I squat, I throw around a lot, I run, and I do all of the things that old men would do because this is a young mans game, and it's tough being an old man playing a young mans game. With that being said, I like being grandpa and coaching this team."

Yobogoya!
Team Captain: John Callan
Team Sponsor: The Scotch House Pub
Captain's Pre-Game Strategy: "Kick the ball. Yeah, that's it. Oh, and catch the ball."


Thursday nights frosty temperature was no match for the heat that was being thrown down on the kickball field. As playoff's approach - kickballers were cranking up the thermostats in anticipation of bracket time. With t-shirts, shorts, and snot running down their noses both teams clutched their cold beers and took to the diamond. Play Ball!!  

The 1st Inning:

Yobogoya's! first ups at the plate were about as exciting as last seasons finale of Snooki & Jwoww. After two consecutive pop-outs to the infield, blue landed a runner safely on first with a line drive to short. A drop to shallow center put runners on first and second...and then it all fell flat, much like the draft Molson's being poured at the stadium. (We kidd - the Molson's are divine.) A pop up to second ended the inning scoreless and cheerless.

Beer Drinkers & Babymakers, which coincidentally was the title of Snooki & Jwoww's season finale, didn't fair too much better at the plate. Two runners being drilled with rubber on their way to first and a fly out to center ended their ups fast. In their defense, with a name like Beer Drinkers & Babymakers - we're not so sure if this team is familiar with the look and feel of rubber.   


The 2nd Inning:

In an attempt to stick it to the Babymakers, Yobogoya! pulled their dress socks up to their knees and took to the ball during the top of the 2nd. First kick = runner thrown out at first. Second kick = runner thrown out at first. Are you sensing a pattern here? Third kick = pop out to second. A tricky pattern...but a pattern of outs, nonetheless.

Just as Ludacris took to the mic...Yobogoya! trotted back out to the field, hoping to jam balls in the mouths of Babymakers. A grounder traveling to short in extreme slow motion landed a runner safely on first with 1 out. A pop up to short and a caught line drive at third kept the beer guzzling babies scoreless and sober.


The 3rd Inning:

It appeared as though the Babymakers had some paranormal assistance in the field during the top of the 3rd. Even with their shortstop and second baseman colliding like bumper cars in the infield, they still managed to catch a pop up to short for the first out of the inning. The Beer Drinkers first baseman got the second out when he dropped the ball prior to making the tag. Huh? That's right. The runner wouldhave been safe had the ball not landed on her foot before stepping on the bag. How's that for crappy ass luck? I bet Yobogoya! put all their money on Dallas to beat Washington during Monday nights game too! The final out was just a plain old regular fly out to center. Nothing magically delicious there.  

Rihanna serenaded the crowd with her sexy Barbadian voice as the Beer Drinkers lined up to kick. A quick one-hopper to short put a runner on base for the first kick of the inning. Fast forward to runners at first and second, and rewind back to 10th grade math class...If Train A leaves second base after a bunt to the pitcher, and Train B leaves first base after a shot to right field...and Train C leaves Milwaukee at 6am on Friday...when will they all arrive home? During the bottom of the 3rd is the answer we were looking for here. 3-0 Babymakers.  


The 4th Inning:

A pop up to the pitcher, a pop up to short, and a grounder to third, left Yo Gabba Gabba looking like a bunch of freakish characters at the plate. The great thing about this half of the inning? It was flipping freezing out and it ended quickly.

Still pumped from their last ups, the beer funneling baby droolers took another crack at the ball. With a boot to left and two kicks to shallow center, they had themselves some runners on the bags. Through the use of some trickery and some speedy footwork, the babymaking drunks sent a run home. 4-0 Beer Drinkers. 


The 5th Inning:

Down by 4 runs, Yobogoya! looked defeated as they organized their line-up for the top of the 5th. With two runners being thrown out at first and with a pop out to center - blue sucked empties and returned to the field.

Psy had most of the Yobogoya! team dancing out to "Gangnam Style" in the outfield during the bottom half of the inning. Luckily, their sic dance skills intimidated the Beer Drinkers and stopped them dead in their tracks. Three outs in four plays...side retired. Still 4-0 Babies.


The 6th Inning:

Intensity grew in the stadium once Baba Booey realized that time was running out for them to play catch up on the scoreboard. The first kick of the inning was a grounder to the pitcher, sending a runner to first, where they beat out the throw. Right now you're probably thinking, "wow, maybe Yobogoya! will tie up this game during this inning". But you'd be really wrong. Two pop ups to center and a throw out at first ended the inning and the momentum of the team. Such a shame. 

Hoping this would be their last ups of the game so they could go drink beer and make babies, the Babymakers tightened the Velcro straps on their cleats and washed down their Big League Chew with a swig of Labatt's. Their first kick was a high line drive up the center, which practically decapitated Yobogoya's! pitcher before hitting the ground. But that's where the excitement ended. Three outs followed immediately - keeping it to a 4-0 game.


The 7th Inning:

With one last shot at staying alive and bringing home the bacon, Yobogoya! tap danced their way up to home plate. A grounder to third landed them their first out of the inning. However, a grounder to first gave them a base runner. Let's go over that again...A grounder to third = out, and a grounder to first = safe? Oh will these crazy kickball shenanigans ever end? Going back to that grounder at first...did we mention that the ball was flipped over the head of the right fielder who was backing up the base, allowing the runner to make it to second? Yeah, that happened. The next kicker popped up to center field. After tagging up, the runner on second went. The Beer Drinkers, who looked like they were 5 or 6 kegs in at this point, allowed the runner to score through a slew of errors. Seriously, like everyone playing in the field received an E on that play. Unfortunately, the next few kicks resulted in outs...keeping the final score of the game to 4-1. Beer Drinkers and Babymakers win! On a related note: Do you think nine months from now there will be a lot more kids at the stadium watching the games?

 
Photo Credits: Frohtography


Source: https://www.nackakickball.com/article.cfm?Page=Articles&ArticleNumber=98

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